Woke up late but luckily was able to meet Min Ling and Debrah on time at Admiralty Mrt Station.

We went to offer our last prayers for Stephanie's grandfather before he was brought to Mandai Crematorium. During the last moment at the viewing hall, i expected alot of crying and wailing from the family. But surprisingly, there were none and all they did was to watch with silent weeps. i was deeply encouraged by the strength and courage they possess in face of their deceased loved one. I recalled reading a quote by Ikeda Sensei from the web:

Birth, aging, sickness and death are the inescapable realities of life, and the eternal questions humankind has attempted to resolve. How can we create the greatest value amidst a reality that is impermanent and in constant flux? It was the search for answers to these questions that led to the birth of Buddhism.

Cycles of birth and death are always continuing and we believe strictly in life after death. So what makes a life worthwhile, is actually the spirit that a person has left behind after his/her passing. Therefore in my opinion, as the closest people to our loved ones, the most important thing is to continue burning the passion in their dreams and hopes for the betterment. To pick ourselves up from misery and never give up striving, i guess that is the best comfort we can offer for ourselves.

Received a sms from IIC Min Min on our way back from the crematorium, asking for company that night to homevisit Pei Pei, our fellow ITAC-SIM part-time student. Her house is at Boon Lay, and in less than 10 seconds of hesitation, we agreed. Min Ling was mentally drained cos she stayed up the night before to watch Man U soccer match, and i almost forgot that i have a test the following day. But we decided, for kofu, everything is worth it. In fact, it is due to these little things that we have the opportunity to challenge ourselves and to spend every min of our free time wisely, isn't it? (:

We met up again in school after our lectures and took bus 154 directly to Boon Lay. Min Ling had a hard time struggling to keep herself awake on the bus. Poor comrade, she will definitely receive many good fortune de. Heehee.

We had a very "open-window" chat with Pei Pei. She is a very vocal & straightforward person, which i think is lacking now in gakkai. The main imperfection is that she dun hesitate to voice out her opinions and dissatisfaction in the way that our organization do things. Her candid and forthright nature can either be beneficial or fatal, it really depends alot on how she phrase her sentences. However i dun deny that some of the fallacies she identified are quite true actually, which i shall not discuss any here, haha. Overall, it was a good discussion & she recommended us a book she bought at Kinokuniya.

I browsed through it and had this sudden urge to read.. Hmm i think i shall go Kinokuniya one day to "jalan-jalan"(walk-walk)

*To side-track abit* Other than being at the most out-of-the-place location on our little island, i realised that Pei Pei's house has this unceasing scent of chocolate and caramel. At first i thought they bought Famous Amos cookie or wad, but it's actually due to the fact that the CADBURY chocolate factory is at the nearby island! COOL RIGHT. I think so too.

Night view from her living room. Nice.

The math test was not as difficult as i had expected, although i didn't had much time and energy to prepare after returning from the homevisitation. My usual careless nature made me lost a few marks here and there, but overall the test was quite ok.

ITAC was invited to support SMU exam daimokukai at TBSC, so i went down just now. In fact ITAC members were more than SMU members present. Anyway i had a super great time chanting as the rhythmic and full-of-life force daimoku by the YMDs were really solid. And i felt as though my entire life state was palpitating as one with the chanting. Truly revitalizing!! It's definitely worth all the numbness of my legs and the coarse voice developed after that.

Will be going down to ICA tml afternoon to teach Jerry biology. The reason why i chose to be at kaikan is because we can go and chant as and when we feel like doing so. After that i will be going for district daimokukai near my mama place, which means that i can taste mama's cooking again. YAY.

It is recently that I feel the need for alot more daimoku. I can still feel the emptiness & fear in me. My life now seemed to have alot of invisible knots for me to discover and untie. I need the wisdom.

*posted on Friday, 5 October 2007, 12.48am*